KENNETH STARR's GREATEST HITS
ANNCR: Just when you thought his only goal
was to "drum" Bill Clinton out of the Oval
Office...Kenneth Starr picks up sticks and Turns The Beatle Around! It's
Starr and his All-Star Band's Back Off, Bubba-loo!
Octopus's Garden" chorus)
One thing fills me
With so much glee
That's the prosecutor's part in
ANNCR: As long as Bubba keeps singin'
"The No-No Song," for Ken and his crew, it just
"Don't Come Easy"!
Every time I see your face
I ask, "How much more disgrace
Will get you to go?"
ANNCR: But it's Ken Starr's only
chance to grab the brass Ring-o, and he's not letting go!
("You're Sixteen" verse)
You came on to a teen
Bitch that I'm mean
When I say it's a crime
You're obscene...you screwed 'em all...
You'll do time!
ANNCR: It's the hits that
just won't quit! Kenneth Starr and his All-Star Band's Back Off,
Bubba-loo! On Crapitol Records and Tapes.
HERE ARE THE TOP FIVE SIGNS YOU DON'T NEED MICROSOFT WINDOWS 98:
#5--SPREADSHEET is what you do just before getting into bed.
#4--BILL GATES is something your accountant does once a month.
#3--You think MOUSE PAD refers to Disney World.
#2--You're offended by the notion that you have a FLOPPY...
AND THE #1 SIGN YOU DON'T NEED WINDOWS 98:
You ask if it comes with a squeegee!
Hey, Mom--what's for dinner? I'm kinda full!
ANNCR: Has your little darling spent all afternoon
"goblin" up his Halloween candy, and now
doesn't have any room for supper?
MOM: What's a mom to do?
ANNCR: Hallo-weenies, that's what! Hallo-weenies
are just like regular hot dogs, except
there's nothing in the middle! But your kids get all the nourishment they
all the nutrients are on the outside! And they cook up plump and juicy
right in your
microwave faster than you can say "boo!"
So get your buns over to your local supermarket and pick up some Hallo-weenies
today! Hallo-weenies! Frank-ly, they're ghoul-icious!
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